I'm lost and stupid without you.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize