Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
