Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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