I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
