So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
