I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
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I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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