i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
