I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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