I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
