That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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