so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
How's work?
Spinning.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize