KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
