I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
