We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
