Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I have grass duct taped all over my body
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The power of my boobs compel you
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
