I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Randomize
