just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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