I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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