Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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