Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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