i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
We were destined to go to rehab together
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
