i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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