Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize