Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'm not a real person

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'm sorry, everyone knows that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): I'm not a real person (586): I'm sorry, everyone knows that http://tfl.nu/uvd5
  Replies (4) Good night (1073) Bad night (1102)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  am i morally bankrupt?

  (970): View more from Colorado

  no. its just the recession

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): am i morally bankrupt? (970): no. its just the recession http://tfl.nu/r26w
  Replies (5) Good night (2855) Bad night (745)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  You're the end to all my bad dreams.

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): You're the end to all my bad dreams. (702): Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again? http://tfl.nu/buiw
  Replies (6) Good night (899) Bad night (2093)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??! http://tfl.nu/ltdu
  Replies (55) Good night (8851) Bad night (888)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2. http://tfl.nu/m96w
  Replies (84) Good night (28273) Bad night (1422)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  running late. just ran over a dude on a bike

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): running late. just ran over a dude on a bike http://tfl.nu/e4pf
  Replies (52) Good night (2288) Bad night (8305)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung. http://tfl.nu/lg9m
  Replies (18) Good night (5241) Bad night (1039)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (514): you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes http://tfl.nu/cth1
  Replies (21) Good night (7922) Bad night (1482)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot... http://tfl.nu/l2p1
  Replies (3) Good night (2285) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!

  (207): View more from Maine

  I just puked in my drinking hat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending! (207): I just puked in my drinking hat. http://tfl.nu/2gwn
  Replies (1) Good night (2153) Bad night (995)
• Favorite

  (628): View more from California

  That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (628): That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM. http://tfl.nu/93q7
  Replies (56) Good night (7143) Bad night (1016)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard. http://tfl.nu/pxmg
  Replies (1) Good night (1178) Bad night (477)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back. http://tfl.nu/53qo
  Replies (1) Good night (364) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices http://tfl.nu/ay6e
  Replies (0) Good night (597) Bad night (271)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice. http://tfl.nu/2u0l
  Replies (5) Good night (615) Bad night (181)

Randomize