Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
