You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
