Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize