i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I love having hate sex.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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