Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
