Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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