We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He? As in you personified your dick?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
