Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
