Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
