my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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