Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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