It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I love you. Go after that dick
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
