I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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