i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
it was like eating out sand paper
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
