maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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