So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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