it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize