I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
