This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
