Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Randomize
