she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
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