im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
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