Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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