If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
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