Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
