I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
